Give or take, a month ago, I lost a friend.. no not lost as in dead, put away your tissue. Such drama drunks you guys are! Nah… I lost as in “out of my sphere of eye-sight, phone-calls or whatever”.
He ‘declared’ his feelings… and well? Yeah? No.
He’s a great guy and all but >_> Omelette… yes… Remember that negro. So, dude told me he’d be deleting my contact off his phone and all that.. I was shocked, confused and yes, a little hurt. I mean, we had been friends for a year. Yes, I didn’t like him that way but seriously, our whole friendship was hinged on Like?! I was really mad at him… for days. I’d just remember him and feel so betrayed… like the whole of our friendship was for him to have the leverage to do this. You know?
Give or take a month later…
I understood better I guess. I don’t really know much about unrequited feelings as per say. But I do know that whatever status of relationship I share with anybody… I really don’t care about what is going on (defining and all that) as far as we are talking and laughing and just having a good time. So, of course, the only time I am forced to actually think about what is happening is when this ‘communication’ factor is taken away… which is, well, childish.
People usually have motives for establishing relationships. It’s not a sinister deal but in a way, it is… companionship, friendship, they want something from you, whatever. It’s dangerous to assume that the world is the same as a kindergarten class. It’s not so innocent. So, I’m taking the time to note people’s interaction ways and stuff to know what they might want and if it’s something I’m ready to give. And you know what? It’s really being helpful in a lot of ways. At least I’m not leading anybody on.
I can’t say I understand what he’s feeling are exactly… I don’t know if he still visits my blog… but if he does, I hope he sees this.
“You’ll always be my friend. I might text you from time to time to be sure you’re fine. I’m a pest like that… I never forget my friends too.”